Intimacy, Kink and Relationship Coaching Playshops

Reading books about sex and relationships, talking to therapist or marriage counselor is a good start, but they don't give real-time feedback or guidance during an experience. You can’t learn how to play an instrument or drive a car by just reading or studying the concept. In-person coaching is learning experientially  I call my workshops 'Playshops' as there's a playful element to sexuality that often disappears into 'shoulds' and unconscious roles when we evolve into adulthood. 


I work in person exclusively with couples and women* incorporating body-based exercises, hands-on coaching, role playing, giving/receiving and open listening. 

Letting go of Shame, guilt and 'shoulds'

Being fully present with your partner

Role playing exercises and games 
Become a masterful lover

Learning to be authentically connected with your partner

Embodiment through sensation play

Erotic touch and sensual massage

Prostate massage and anal pleasure

Pegging, strap-on sex and toys
Re-ignite passion in marriage and partnerships

Explore kink, FLR, D/s and power play

Erotic embodiment through sensation play

Opening up a marriage, non-monogamy, polyamory, swinging

Dating after divorce

Sex and aging 

Learn new modes of intimacy (besides intercourse)

Coping with erectile dysfunction (ED)

Sex and disability

Sexually inexperienced/virgin

Menopause, vaginismus, painful intercourse
Asking for what you really desire 

Using porn in healthy ways

Giving and receiving pleasure with sex toys

LGBTQ relationships

Coming out as queer, trans, gay, bi 

Become a masterful lover

Feeling confident and sexy in your body right now

Unconditionally fall in love with yourself


What does a Playshop look like?

{COVID update: I will receive my second vaccine at the end of March. I will be open to booking Playshops starting mid April 2021.}

*Who can enroll in a Playshop?

  • I coach adults who are 21+ years of age.

  • For couples, I welcome all genders and sexual orientations.

  • For individuals (those who are not going to have a partner with them), I work exclusively with women, femme-identifying and non-binary folks. 

  • If you're a man and would like to be considered for a Playshop without your partner or wife attending, I must have a conversation with her in our initial introduction call.

  • If you don't meet the requirements for a Playshop, I recommend booking individual sex and relationship sessions online.

Where do your Playshops take place?

My intensive 2-day Playshops take place in Portland, Oregon or at a hotel suite in any city (see Bring the Playshop to Me under fees.) 

Would you travel to my city?

I travel to San Francisco and Seattle a few times a year (get on my Mailing list to find out when I might be in your city.) You can also book a Playshop to your city (see fees). 

What does a typical Playshop schedule look like?

Before we meet, we will have an hour video conference to go over what you would like to get out of the Playshop, what you would like to experience, your fears, your excitement and go over questions. After our conference, I put together a loose events timeline based on what you would like to explore. 

Day one: We break the ice over games, tea, light snacks around 4:30pm, then we lauch and go until 6:30pm. 

Dinner break from 6:30-7:30pm inside the hotel. Dinner, and snacks are included in the Playshop fees.

Finishing up around 10pm. 

Day two: We start around 10am finishing up around 1pm. Includes light snacks and a sensual feeding excercise (a juicy ending!) I'll also give fun excercises and games to practice at home.

We follow up a week later over a video session on what you got out of the Playshop, what stretched your boundaries and what was surpising and fun.


Am I going to do anything I don't want to do?

Nope. Never.

While I want to help you get to the next level that may be outside of your comfort zone, we check in with each other before, during and after. Sometimes a 'No' can turn into a 'Maybe' and then to 'Oh my oh yes, more of that!' as consent can change in the moment. I will coach you and your partner on setting boundaries, asking for exactly what you want and listening without judgement without killing the mood. 


Are you a licenced sex therapist?

No, I am a somatic sex educator (Certified Sexological Bodyworker, CSB) who can do hands-on coaching. As professionals, we work within an ethical container practice with our students. 

A therapist works with uncovering trauma and working through deeper issues. If you're stuggling with deeper issues or sexual assault, I encourage folks to work with a sex-positive therapist in conjunction to seeing me. Learn more about the difference between sex therapists, sex coaching and surrogate partner therapy.


"Dear Melissa, I wanted to say thank you for the sexy fun and intense weekend Beth and I had, we learned so much and Beth appreciated how you made her feel comfortable on that first day. We've been practing the sensual touch techniques and slowing down...It was a rollercoaster of feelings and I'm so glad you we found you."

-Robert and Beth, 2/11/2020

"I stopped focussing on the goal of "finishing" and worrying I wasn't doing it right...letting go of my definition of sex and just experiencing the journey of pleasure has made a profound difference in my self-esteem and confidence."


"The biggest challenge was getting out of my head and just being present. A lot of unexpected emotions came up and you were so patient with me."

-Monika, San Jose, CA

Fees and Terms

The cost for the intensive is $3800. It includes dinner, snacks and refreshments. The Playshop takes places in a comfortable hotel or private home rental in Portland, Oregon.

If you're traveling to Portland and booking your own hotel suite, I can host the Playshop at your space at a reduced fee. 

If you would like me to bring the Playshop to your city on the west coast (San Francisco, Seattle, Las Vegas) add $1000 for travel fees. I can also put togther a custom quote to travel anywhere in the US, work with your time constraints

How do I book a Playshop? 

You would contact me, pay the $35 fee for our introduction call (which will go towards the Playshop or future online coaching.) On the call I'll answer all your questions and we determine an Intensive or online sessions are a better fit for you or your partner. Once we book the date and place, we will set up a video conference to go over logistics and details. 

Do you offer sliding scale fees for Playshops?

I offer sliding scale fees for women of color and trans individuals who can attend the Playshop in Portland. 

What is your cancellation and refund policy for Playshops? 

Your initial 50% deposit is refundable with a 14-day or more notice. Less than14-day notice, the deposit may be used for a future event within 6 months, minus hotel cost. However, any travel fees (if I’m flying to you and booking 2-4 nights in a hotel) are non-refundable. If I have to cancel due to illness, I will hold your 50% deposit for another mutually agreed-upon date to occur within 6 months. The balance is due on the first day of the Playshop. I do not give any refunds the day of or after the Playshop.

Ready to evolve your sexuality, love and relationships? Contact me